Topic: Codependency

Topic: Codependency

How do people find strength in their journey to sobriety? This AA-style speaker meeting with Bob E takes a hard, funny, and painfully honest look at codependency and how it ties into addiction, eating disorders, and growing up in chaotic homes. Bob cracks open big ideas in very down-to-earth language.

He jokes that no one really knows what intimacy means, then drops a line that sticks: "Intimacy is me being me, and letting you see me." From there, he talks about how alcoholic and so-called "good" dysfunctional families both teach children to hide their real selves, obey the rules, and never upset the parents – all while quietly piling on shame.

You’ll hear vivid stories about rigid, ultra-obedient upbringings, strict religious homes, and families that look perfect on the outside but crush feelings at the dinner table. Bob connects these patterns to codependency, which he defines as living "your entire life focused outside of yourself" – if you’re happy, I’m happy; if you’re upset, it’s his job to fix you.

Bob stresses the importance of feeling emotions, grieving childhood losses, and using group therapy to heal shame, rather than just "working the steps and shutting up." He also reminds parents in recovery that they can break the cycle, sharing tender and funny stories about becoming a late-in-life dad and wanting his daughter to be herself, not just “fit in.” If you’ve ever wondered why you people-please, fear anger, or lose yourself in relationships, this raw, humorous talk might be exactly the reality check you’ve been waiting for.

This talk is aimed at people in recovery from alcohol, drugs, food issues or adult children of alcoholic/dysfunctional families who sense there’s more going on underneath the substance.