But I was very mindful that I wasn't going to do it again until I did it again, you know, because I was certain that there was going to be no way to find this out. Now, I know you attempted to get some help, and I want to hear about that, and I think, I know for me, I mean, one of my thoughts back in the day before I've met more people and heard their story has actually been, okay, I can see how you succumb to it, but as a healthcare professional, especially, shouldn't you recognize that there's a problem and maybe you're scared and maybe you don't know where to go, but recognize that I shouldn't be doing this.