Love vs Need: Michael Stoller's Insights on Emotional Sobriety
Love comes Only Days, Weeks, Months, years, Decades after you fall in need with somebody.
Is your relationship driven by love or need? In this episode of 'MY BLUEPRINT: Struggle Towards Emotional Sobriety', Michael Stoller dives into this crucial question. As a therapist with extensive experience working with teenage boys and middle-aged men, Stoller has observed a common pattern: men often elevate their significant others to a god-like status.
Drawing from his own life, he candidly shares how he once made his ex-wife his god and how practicing emotional sobriety has helped him avoid repeating that mistake. Stoller introduces two memorable acronyms to help listeners differentiate between love and need: 'let others voluntarily evolve' for love and 'nobody ever ends up different' for need. He emphasizes that genuine love fosters growth and challenges individuals to become better versions of themselves, while need often leads to stagnation.
In this short yet impactful episode, Stoller also touches on the values of resilience and empathy, explaining how they are often forged through tough experiences. He encourages listeners to reflect on their own relationships and consider whether they are rooted in love or need. Whether you're navigating a new relationship or reevaluating an old one, Stoller's insights offer valuable guidance on the path to emotional sobriety. Tune in to discover how you can foster healthier, more fulfilling connections.